Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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