we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
