why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
