Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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