i permit you to call me
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
