I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
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