It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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