Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
