my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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