Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Dignity is for republicans.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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