I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Randomize
