Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
