We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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