I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
