if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
