we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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