I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Randomize
