In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
