dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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