you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
