Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
