I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
