she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
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