nutella sex= disaster
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
