never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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