I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
