we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
