I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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