i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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