This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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