CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
