I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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