She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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