R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
