I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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