I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
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