You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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