Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
