he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
