So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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