Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
