You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
