I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
