nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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