I'd wear matching sweaters with you
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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