my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
