good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
false alarm. still invincible.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
