hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
