do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
