I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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